Looking back at the post from January, I am struck by how little things have changed. This was my summer of hope. Going back to living. Letting my boys have fun, have friends. Seeing family. Except it isn't really.
Things are better ~ some ~ but not better enough. I had such high hopes that we were turning a corner. Vaccines and masking that was working, preventing. But it isn't working. Because not everyone is willing to participate. Not everyone is willing to protect my kids. The not-so-low-level-mom-rage that simmers inside of me ALL the time now makes me cranky. Impatient. Short tempered. Exhausted. We gave up more than a year of "normal" life, and if my loved ones get sick now ~ after all we sacrificed ~ because someone has been fed a line of bullshit about the efficacy of masking or vaccines I AM GOING TO BE PISSED OFF. It's like the HIV epidemic all over again. Fear, misinformation, judgement, the average human being unwilling to make small behavioral changes to prevent sickness and death. I cannot fathom how this works. How people can just be cavalier about the lives of others. How they sleep at night or look in a mirror. How many preventable deaths is too many? Oh, wait. One.
Apparently I'm not actually ready to write about this yet.
